We gathered together in the dining room to talk about the emotions that had surfaced since we heard the news - shock, sadness, guilt, anger, and frustration that we couldn't help him.
Carla, who had not known Murray, but saw how those of us who did were affected, kindly offered to provide refreshments, because, as she said, "I believe food nurtures more than the mere body" - and she was right.
Roz had decorated the room with soft-lit electric candles and arrangements of dried plants from our gardens. There was a pensive photo of Murray and Susana's beautiful tribute to him displayed on a table.
Several in the community who, like Carla, had not personally known Murray, came to provide support and help us deal with our grief and sense of loss. That meant a great deal.
We talked for almost two hours. At times we wept as we recalled how Murray had struggled with his anxiety and depression. At other times we laughed as we remembered Murray's offbeat sense of humour.
We remembered his incredible generosity, his willingness to tackle new projects, his creativity, his skills as a master electrician and a scuba diver, his passionate concern for the environment.
Murray was a unique shining star, a man like no other. He could be bombastic and in-your-face, tender and loving, argumentative and then accepting. We will never forget him.
We'll be holding a gathering for his family and his many friends on Saturday, Nov. 23rd from 2 to 5 pm at Pacific Gardens, where we will celebrate his life with music and food and share our stories.
Here is a picture of Murray as we like to remember him, taken at the ribbon-cutting ceremony for Pacific Gardens a little more than four years ago.
Kathryn
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Murray Rogers, centre, with Pacific Gardens co-founders, 2009 |
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